1 To run away with me, my girlfriend, Sarah, agreed to have a child with her childhood friend, Liam, to carry on his family line. After their first son was born, she told me the baby was too young to be without his mother. She asked me to wait until he was three. Three years passed. Then she said his family wanted a daughter to make the family "complete." She asked me to wait a little longer. I waited and waited. I watched 1,460 sunrises and sunsets over Mount Rainier. When I finally thought we could leave, I found she had scheduled a vasectomy for me. When I stood before her with the surgical notice and my hiking pack, she clung to Liam and pleaded with me, "His grandparents want a third grandchild. Can you just wait a little longer?" The moment she said it, the world spun, and I fell down the stairs. In my last moments of fading consciousness, I saw Sarah looking down at me, her gaze cold and distant. "This is what you get, Matt, for not knowing your place." I slowly closed my eyes, my heart finally dead. It was time to leave. Alone. "Well, well, if it isn't the leech who's always clinging to Miss Spencer. I heard he's been trying to worm his way into the family." "See? Karma's a bitch. The Spencers gave specific instructions: no holding back during the procedure. Just castrate him." "Once he's got nothing down there, let's see how he bothers Miss Spencer then! Serves him right!" I opened my eyes and tried to sit up, but a sharp, piercing pain shot through my lower body. Hearing me stir, the two nurses by my bed fell silent, but the contempt in their eyes was unconcealed. I was used to these stinging glares. "How long can I stay here?" I asked. The heavier nurse's voice dripped with sarcasm. "Mr. Hayes, you can be discharged right now. Of course, you can stay as long as you like. We will be happy to serve you." She then pulled the other nurse away, her mocking voice trailing behind her. "You see that? A grown man with red eyes, about to cry? Who's he putting on a show for? Is he waiting for Miss Spencer to come? Give me a break. She's got the handsome Mr. Lawson. Why would she come looking for him? He must be delusional." I lowered my gaze and lifted the blanket, looking at the bloodstains on my pants. A bitter smile touched my lips. They were mistaken. I wasn't waiting for Sarah to come. I was trying to hide for a few days. It was her ovulation period. Every month at this time, they would be inseparable, their passion unbridled and on full display. Every time, the sounds of their lovemaking were like daggers, stabbing me over and over. But I couldn't say a word. Sure enough, ten days later, when I limped through the door, my face pale, they were on the sofa, wrapped in a post-coital kiss. Liam was kissing Sarah's neck, his eyes meeting mine with a provocative smile. He suddenly bit down harder. Sarah gasped, a mix of protest and pleasure in her voice. "Liam, we've been at it all morning. You're insatiable. The pregnancy test is already positive!" She picked up the test from the table, bouncing with joy. "Two lines! Liam, I'm pregnant with your third child!" 2 Then, she pouted and playfully hit his chest. "Oh no, you were so rough just now. What if you hurt the baby? You're terrible!" Liam wrapped his arms around her, his hand gently caressing her stomach. "Of course not. Daddy will be gentle from now on. I won't scare our little one." Sarah leaned against him, her face radiant with the joy of impending motherhood. It was a stark contrast to the cold, calculating woman who had drugged me and sent me for the procedure. Even though I knew this was coming, my heart still clenched in pain. Sarah finally noticed me standing at the door. She froze, instinctively pulling away from Liam. Her voice was tinged with apology and guilt. "Matt, you heard? We didn't have a choice. Grandpa said the company is too much for just two children to handle. A third heir is a safer bet." "Otherwise, we wouldn't have to bother Liam, who's already so busy, to make a baby with me." She gave Liam an apologetic kiss, completely oblivious to my ashen face. Liam deepened the kiss, chuckling as he ran his fingers through her damp hair. "It's nothing, Sarah. As long as it makes you happy." As they were about to get lost in each other again, a wave of resentment surged through me. I stood up straight and interrupted them. "Then why isn't my child good enough?" Sarah's expression became complicated, her brow furrowed. "Matt, what are you talking about?" I gave a humorless smile and asked again, "Sarah, wouldn't my child be your child too? Not worthy of being born?" Before she could answer, a toy car came flying from upstairs and hit me on the forehead. An angry, childish voice followed. "Not worthy! Not worthy! You're a creepy old man! Stop bothering my mommy! You're not allowed to bully my mommy!" I stumbled back a few steps. Just as I regained my balance, a small boy came running at full speed and knocked me over. It was Sarah and Liam's three-year-old son. "Creepy old man! How dare you come back! I won't let you in my house! Get out!" He started punching and kicking at my groin. The area was already a mess of infection and decay from the botched surgery. If I hadn't gone to a clinic in time, I might have lost everything. There was no way I could withstand a child's frantic assault. I scrambled to get away, my body trembling with pain. Sarah saw the beads of sweat rolling down my forehead and quickly pulled her son away. "Leo, is that how you talk to your Uncle Matt? Apologize!" But Liam caught her raised hand. He stepped between us, frowning. "Sarah, why are you being so harsh with him? Have you forgotten what you promised me?" "Besides, how much strength can a little kid have…" Liam trailed off, shooting me a disgusted look. The concern on Sarah's face faded, replaced by disappointment. She turned to me, her voice laced with exasperation. "Matt, you're a man. It was just a small procedure. How can it still hurt after all this time? Are you really going to hold a grudge against a child?" "Besides, you were the one who said something inappropriate. Don't say it again." I bit my trembling lip. 3 Seeing I had no intention of backing down, Sarah's face grew stern. She pushed me towards the nursery. "Alright, alright, Matt, go take care of the baby." "You've been looking after her since she was born. She's more attached to you than to me or Liam now. When she cries, no one else can soothe her. It's exhausting." I stood up, the pain shooting through me, and met her gaze. "Sarah, I told you, I'm not doing it anymore. I'm not your nanny." But as if on cue, the family's old housekeeper, Mrs. Lee, rushed out and shoved Sarah's newborn daughter into my arms. "Matt? Oh, you're finally back! Miss Spencer said you had a little procedure. Why stay in the hospital so long? A grown man, so delicate!" She shot me a disdainful glance. "Quick, quick, take her! These old bones of mine are about to fall apart. There, she's all yours now. Take good care of her." Then she shooed Sarah and the others out the door. "Miss Spencer, Mr. Lawson, what are you still dawdling for? Did you forget you're taking Leo to the family dinner tonight? Look at the time, let's go, let's go!" I tried to hand the baby back, but Mrs. Lee blocked my way like a brick wall, escorting Sarah out. Her eyebrows were raised high, her expression as fierce as a cornered animal. "You leech, what do you think you're doing? Back in my day, a man with designs on the young miss would have been crippled and thrown to the pigs! Know your place!" "Pah!" She spat on my face, and the door slammed shut. The only sound was the baby's piercing cries, which felt like they were about to shatter my heart. I stared blankly at the child in my arms, wondering how my life had come to this. My wandering gaze fell on the photo wall in the living room. I realized that, at some point, the photos of Sarah and me hiking in the mountains had been slowly replaced by family portraits of her, Liam, and their son. There was no trace of me left. Only a single, small photo of a snow-capped mountain remained. It was Mount Rainier, the place where Sarah and I had fallen in love, the place where we were supposed to get married. Just before we were set to leave, her grandparents, disgusted by my humble origins, had insisted she marry Liam Lawson, the heir to the Lawson fortune. Sarah had run away from home. We were already in Seattle, about to head into the mountains. But a call from the ICU pulled her back. When she reappeared before me, she was rail-thin, her eyes swollen from crying. She fell to her knees. "Matt, I'm sorry. My grandparents raised me. I can't let them die. But I can't lose you either!" "I made a deal. If I have a son with Liam, they'll let me go." "Matt, please, don't be angry, don't leave me. Liam is just a means to an end. You're the one I truly love! Just bear with me for ten months, okay?" The first time, Sarah cried in my arms, clinging to me desperately. At the last moment, she pushed me away and stumbled into Liam's room. She was back in my room in less than a minute. 4 The second time, she was gone for half an hour. The third time, she stayed the night. The fourth, the fifth… Slowly, she went from insisting I wear a condom to forbidding me from touching her at all, saying she was afraid of "contaminating" the Spencer and Lawson bloodlines. She told me to be patient, that it would all be over after she gave birth. I sat in my room, waiting in bitter silence until dawn, but she never came back. I waited through the first child, the second. I watched 1,460 sunrises and sunsets over Mount Rainier. Sarah and Liam grew closer, more and more like a real married couple. And I, a man who had traveled the world, had become their nanny and childminder. I had fought, I had argued, I had even cried in frustration. Sarah would always soothe me, then go right back to Liam's side. Now, a third child was on the way. I should have seen it long ago. I should have left. I sat in a daze until late at night. Sarah's family finally returned, laughing and talking. The moment they opened the door, they froze. Her daughter was on the sofa, having cried herself into a state of exhaustion. The photos on the wall were all torn down, shredded to pieces. "Matt! I told you to take care of our daughter! Why isn't she making a sound? Are you trying to kill her?" Sarah lunged at me and slapped me across the face, her expression contorted with rage. Liam rushed to pick up the baby and shoved her into my arms. "Matt! Just because you're sad about losing your chance to have children, it doesn't give you the right to take it out on my daughter!" "Get back in there and feed her, change her diaper!" But I was unmoved. I even smiled. "I told you, I'm not your nanny anymore. Don't you understand?" Liam was stunned, then he laughed coldly, his finger practically poking me in the eye. "Sarah, you see? I told you he was holding a grudge! Has it been easy for me these past few years? I've put up with the gossip, raised three children with you without any official status, all to make your love story happen!" "And in the end, I'm the bad guy!" Sarah gritted her teeth and slapped me again, her eyes blazing. "Matt, do you have any idea how busy Liam is? Do you know how proud he is? He's not even my boyfriend, but he's had three children with me, all for you!" But if she would just open her eyes, she would see that the "busy" man she was talking about was practically glued to her 24/7, and still looked as vibrant as ever. And I was like a candle about to burn out, the dark circles under my eyes reaching down to my mouth, all because I had spent the last three months pulling all-nighters, cleaning up after her daughter. And now, I couldn't even have children of my own. And what's more, I was never the one who asked him to have children in the first place. Why was I the one paying the price? My expression was as dead as my heart. Sarah took it as a provocation and grew even angrier. "Can't you be more understanding? My grandparents were starting to like you because you took such good care of the kids. Our plan was so close to succeeding. What is your problem now?" "Don't you want to go to Mount Rainier with me anymore?" That threat again. The last flicker of love in my heart finally extinguished. I fought back the tears from the slap and said, my voice filled with a strange sense of release, "No, Sarah. I don't want to go with you anymore."